Thursday, April 14, 2011

Pimp My Easter Basket: Road Kill Easter Bunny Bar Cookies

You didn’t forget about the Pimp My Easter Basket challenge, did you? Well, if you did, never fear: You still have a week to craft something and send us a picture and/or blog post link. I, on the other hand, already have a submission. One that could help you disposition sub-par chocolate Easter candy that you may receive.

Roadkill Easter Bunny Bar Cookies. Perfect for little kids. Tell them that you baked the Easter Bunny into some bar cookies. They definitely won’t cry.

Now I know you’re thinking, “Victoria, what kind of sick, twisted ^$^(*& are you?”. The answer? The kind that makes outrageous-looking bar cookies. With sub-par Easter Candy.


Yes, Russell Stover “chocolate” sucks. It’s not even worth reviewing. But if you surround it with butter, sugar, eggs, and flour, it becomes more palatable.

And perversely humorous.

Roadkill Easter Bunny Bar Cookies (Inspired by Betty Crocker and my screwed up brain)

12 tablespoons butter, softened

3 egg yolks, or one whole egg and one egg yolk, room temperature

½ cup sugar

½ cup brown sugar

1 ½ cups flour

½ teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon vanilla

Beat butter on medium speed in a stand mixer for about two minutes, then add sugars and cream for two to three minutes. Scrape down the sides of the bowl, then add egg yolks, salt and vanilla, beat an additional minute. Add flour and mix on low speed until just incorporated. Press dough into an 8-inch by 8-inch pan.

Place one nasty-tasting chocolate Easter Bunny in a spot on top of the dough.

Press it into the dough so that the edges are underneath part of the dough.

Manipulate the dough around the edges of the nasty-tasting chocolate Easter Bunny so that you get a seal around the chocolate – this prevents the chocolate from running all over the dough and helps maintain the Easter Bunny shape.

Repeat with more nasty-tasting chocolate Easter Bunnies.

Bake at 350° F for 25-30 minutes.

Share with your favorite children. Be sure to tell them that the Tooth Fairy was part of the hamburgers you had for dinner.

What do you do with bad Easter candy?

Posted by Victoria at 8:37 AM

19 comments:

  1. SarahApril 14, 2011 at 8:46 AM

    I love it!!! Someone just gave me Russel Stover Bunnies and now I have a use for them!

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  2. MichelleApril 14, 2011 at 8:52 AM

    AWESOME

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  3. HannahApril 14, 2011 at 9:08 AM

    Actually, my thoughts were "*laughter* oh Victoria, you're brilliant, and this is why we're friends". :D

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  4. AnonymousApril 14, 2011 at 10:04 AM

    hahahahahahahaha so funny!!! Those easter bunnies really are nasty aren't they? Loved these cookies! :D

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  5. AnonymousApril 14, 2011 at 10:34 AM

    Ha that is hilarious and so cute. This is exactly what I want to make-can I steal ideas...is that cheating ha.

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  6. AnonymousApril 14, 2011 at 12:42 PM

    YUMMY! YUMMY! YUMMY! This will definitely be made!!!

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  7. EmmaApril 14, 2011 at 2:08 PM

    Part of me thinks "gross," another part, "great!"

    At any rate, I think it's a good excuse to cut that pan into only 4 bars! Wouldn't want to decapitate any road-killed rabbits.

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  8. Lauren at Keep It SweetApril 14, 2011 at 3:03 PM

    This is hilarious! Love it

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  9. The Poet HerselfApril 14, 2011 at 4:03 PM

    I agree--that "chocolate" is gross. I like your inventive use of it, though!

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  10. BethApril 14, 2011 at 4:06 PM

    Haha, awesome! You know what would make it better? Frosting. Red frosting. That bunny had it coming :)

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  11. AnonymousApril 14, 2011 at 4:09 PM

    I love that!!

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  12. Lot-O-ChocApril 14, 2011 at 4:29 PM

    Such a good idea to get rid of bad easter chocolate, mine normally goes in the bin or to family members who think its a lot better than i do!

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  13. lacochran's evil twinApril 14, 2011 at 5:42 PM

    There's such a thing as bad chocolate?

    *blink*

    *blink*

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  14. Jessica @ bake me away!April 14, 2011 at 8:07 PM

    Marvelous!! With "road kill" in the title, I'd be tempted to run toy trucks over the melty bunnies hot from the oven for some tread action. Yay for perverse humor!

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  15. Debbie B.April 14, 2011 at 8:55 PM

    Hilarious and absolutely love it.

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  16. LoraApril 15, 2011 at 1:50 AM

    Subpar Easter candy deserves to be roadkill. This is just brilliant! Loooove it.

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  17. Mary at n00bcakesApril 15, 2011 at 7:41 AM

    I am apparently a heathen, as I cannot tell the difference between lame chocolate and good chocolate....but I love the roadkill idea! Fantastic - PUT IT IN MAH BASKET!

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  18. Corinne DeBraApril 29, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    Loved these/this road kill cookie, and the whole pimp my Easter basket idea. Very clever and creative.

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  19. KittyApril 30, 2011 at 11:58 AM

    This is fabulous. Brilliant & stupendous.

    I see Road Kill Santa bar cookies later in the year... with Beth's red frosting and Jessica's toy trucks... oh yeah.

    Now... IF I receive subpar chocolates, I recycle them into 'Chocolat Chaud à la Ancienne'

    Here is my recipe. I hope you enjoy it. :)

    http://lacheshirechat.blogspot.com/2010/01/vigilance-orange-and-chocolat-chaud-la.html

    Kind regards, Kitty

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